I never really decided to have children.

I got married at twenty-seven. We bought a house a couple of years later. Then people started asking.

“When are you two going to have kids?”

We laughed it off at first.

Eventually my wife stopped taking birth control. I remember talking about whether we could afford a baby. Whether we needed a bigger car. Which room would become the nursery.

I don’t remember either of us asking whether we wanted one.

Our son was born the following year. Our daughter came three years later.

I love them. I wouldn’t wish them away.

But sometimes when younger people tell me they don’t want children, I’m surprised by how certain they sound.

It never occurred to me that it was something you could decide not to do.

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